Desperation and Thoughts
by EriksPhan
Summary: Revised and resubmitted! Christine runs away from a tormented life with Raoul and searches for her angel!


This is my first attempt at a phanfic and I am a little nervous about it, I do not own The phantom of the opera the ingenious Andrew Lloyd Webber does. Please read and review eh 

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**Chapter One: Desperation and Thoughts

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**

Christine looked back at the phantom from the boat that she and Raoul had taken to get out of the Phantoms lair. As she was looking back at him she felt a peculiar feeling settle in her chest, the oddest feeling that she thought she would never be capable of feeling when it came to Erik, Remorse.

"Oh Erik" she mumbled faintly to herself as she heard her angel sing defeated

"_It's over now, the music of the night_"

Christine found it simply impossible to stop herself from sobbing as she saw her phantom, her angel disappear into the plunging looming darkness. Raoul had mistaken her sob of sadness and loss, for one of sheer happiness. He smiled and spoke of the days where she would no longer have to hide; everyday will be like summertime for Christine and Raoul  
.

"The monster is finally gone Christine, we are free" He exclaimed excitedly

"Don't call him that Raoul" Christine found herself snap under her breath

"What was that my dear" He questioned looking down at her

Christine shook her head immediately and Raoul turned his head ignorantly and happily away, Christine turned around again and felt lonely. The first time in her life, as long as she could remember she had always had her father, or her angel. She absentmindedly rubbed her lips where her angel's soft and innocent lips had lingered merely minutes ago.

"Is this to be my future?" Christine thought: loneliness and memories. She looked towards the front of the boat and all she could see was the looming darkness.

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**…_Two years later…

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_**

Christine looked desperately for her purse in the darkness; she had just enough time to get away. She had not a second to waste, it had to be meticulous. She looked back at the drugged man behind her and saw him stir slightly. She grabbed her purse and the man's and ran towards the door; immediately locking it as she closed the man inside the room.

She had only one place to go where she knew she would be safe. Back to the opera popular, back to her rooms, back to her angel.

She ran faster than she had ever ran in her life to the old abandoned building of her adolescence, finally reaching it puffing, her ribs aching beneath her tightly laced corset. She looked at the door, seeing it wasn't bolted or locked in any way she nervously opened the door her eyes adjusting to the blackness surrounding her as she stepped in the building.

"Erik" She tentatively whispered lighting a nearby candle

As she had expected she had not received the slightest answer. Knowing this opera building like the back of her hand she moved with unusual quickness and agility to her old rooms before she had run away to the handsome Raoul. She pushed open the familiar door coughing at the accumulated dust that had appeared over the years of neglect. Christine pushed the door shut behind her and lighted more candles letting her eyes search for any signs of her angel. She knew she hadn't much time before Raoul would stir; she had not drugged him that deeply, hoping her angel would quickly come to her rescue. She cleared her throat and began her desperate song; fearing her husband would know where she was going.

"_Angel of music hide no longer, come to me please angel"  
_

"_Angel of music don't deny me come to me now angel"_

"_Angel my soul was weak to leave you, save me now angel"  
_

Christine felt herself become increasingly desperate when she had received no answer, she needed her angel to save her – otherwise she was certainly dead nothing but her angel could save her now. Christine felt her heartbeat quicken when she heard the opera front door wrenched open and a familiar voice cry:

"CHRISTINE, I know you're in here bitch, you can't get away from me this time"

Christine ran around the room, searching for an escape route, after finding none she felt her breath disappear and she felt faint. She felt herself crashing to the floor her head scraping the edge of the wooden dressing table and falling into unconsciousness.

Erik had been watching from the other side of the mirror confused. She had come to him her eyes pleading and desperate. Erik forced a small grin as he saw her panic at the words of her husband. She had chosen him after all; she had left him, his music, and his love to become a viscount's wife. Yet when he saw deep red blood pour from the wound on her head he took immediate worry and ran in the room to sweep her up into his arms and to take her once again into his music's throne.

She felt light in his arms and he stole a glance down at her unconscious form. She had indeed lost weight and had seemed to have lost the innocence that only youth can hold. She was no little girl anymore she had matured and blossomed somewhat into a woman. He looked at her face; she still had the beauty of the dark brown pools for eyes and the creaminess and perfection of her skin. But her skin had swallowed and her saw that she was in a terrible condition. He looked at her clothes; she was wearing a dress of the darkest green with her hair pinned tightly to her head. He felt an ache in his heart as he felt her flesh against his own and he had to pull himself out of his revere.

He placed her down on his swan bed and took immediate action, seeing that the wound on her head was of no serious consequence he found a spare towel and placed gentle pressure on her head. She stirred slightly but still remained unconscious. He felt an odd sensation run though his entire body as he ashamedly thought.

"You can easily take her now, she is vulnerable to you, take her, come on here is your chance, she would never have you normally you hideous beast" He pushed this thought far from her mind, but thought about taking her away. It would be foolish to stay in this old lair any longer as he was sure that the viscount would find a way to reach this place. He carried Christine to his carriage and told the carriage driver to hurry as they must reach his mansion without being followed by whomever she was running from

"She must have been desperate if she sought after my help" Erik thought bitterly, his mind and body aching as he vividly remembered their last encounter.

"_The tears I might have shed for your dark fate, grow cold, and turn to tears of HATE"_

He turned down to look at her innocent face, full of curiosity of why she had come. It had been lucky he had been there to save her at all, only coming back to his old home to get music manuscripts he had left by the piano when he heard her calling. Erik had frozen, believing this to be another cruel dream, as he had many since she had left. He had dreamt of her returning telling him of her deep love to him, them in a passionate embrace, in his swan bed limbs locked together in passion. But they were just dreams.

Erik once again felt shame for the way he was feeling about her. _"Impure thoughts"_ his mind screamed and he focused on the stars through out the whole journey to his home.

Once they reached the mansion he hurried her into his bedroom, his doorman raising a questioning eyebrow. Erik said nothing and slammed the door behind him. He placed her gently down on the bed and sat and watched her sleep. He was frightened that she would never wake up. This was a strange emotion for Erik, as he was never frightened of anything.

The sun shone in Christine's eyes and she felt her eyelids flutter open gently, her head aching she attempted to sit up but felt an immediate state of dizziness overwhelm her. She mumbled a quiet "Angel" before she fell into a deep sleep. 

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Well! That was my first chapter, let me know what you think and please review! My thanks to dani and lola!


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